Losing

God kveld godt folk. I dag og i går var jeg i Sykkylven med krinskoret på øving. Det har våre kjempe kjekt, men nå er jeg heilt utslitt. Hadde egentlig ikke tenkt å skrive så mye. Så jeg legger ut noe jeg har begynt å skrive. Det er ikke ferdig, og ikke bra, men jeg vil dele det med deg. Det som står der, betyr mye for meg, jeg prøver bare å få det ut med ord. Engelsken min suger, men dere overlever.

Losing


I’ve lost my best friend. Just because I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I told him that I love him, a bit more than as a friend. And in a second... everything was broken. My inside is totally crouched. I really don’t know if I can take one more day without him. And every night I’m forced to spend without him, is like living in hell. The devil holds on to me.... tight with him, he’s struggling me. He’s holding me down, and force me to be hurting, and alone.


He was gone for so long; it felt like a lifetime in hell to me. But when he came back, it felt like I was in heaven. He pushed the devil away with telling me that he love me, and missed me. It was so god to see him suffering. Suffering for all the bad he did to me, to see him hurt just as much as I did. With our love, we forced him back to hell, to suffer greatly, alone.


And now, just as fast as you came back, you just disappeared. And then, you decided to live me... like forever. You’re going to work, far too long away. I don’t know if I can handle that. I need you too much for that. And in some way, I believe you need me just as much. I can’t understand how I can do so many things wrong, when I’m just trying to be nice. I just want to see you one more time. That’s all I’m asking for. One time.